Last week I started my third cycle of chemotherapy. I know there has been a delay in me writing as i usually avoid writing when I am sick.. 

This is the first time i’ve had chemotherapy through my PICC line which has meant no pain in my arm.. but it’s also been the chemo which has left me most unwell.. 

I began to feel pretty rubbish from the point of recieving the chemo.. The nausea has been indescribable as well as the sore mouth.. This is the first time I throw up after chemo.. Even my pills I struggled to keep down.. And trust me when you’re  on a bag full of medications it’s never going to be easy.. My medications have now been increased to 5 different tablets to help control my nausea alone.. 

I can’t remember the last time I threw up before falling ill.. I never imagined the day would come when i’m openly discussing throwing up.. I’d much prefer to talk about shoes.. but I have to vent and say I don’t particularly enjoy that burning sensation at the back of the throat.. Vomiting leaves you feeling as weak as can be.. Frail.. sometimes hopeless.. 

Back to medication talk (how exciting!) But I have to say.. How the hell do elderly patients take so many tablets in a day? I’m only on 8 different tablets (14 tablets to swallow per day).. I promise you I can’t remember to take them all always.. And sometimes I choose not to.. That sounds awful coming from a doctor, but currently i’m wearing my patient hat so no judging..

The bag of medicatins which I was given to take home..

I choose to not share any photos from my last chemo session as simply looking at them makes me want to gag!

So.. really the point of my post today is simply to say tomorrow my repeat scan will be discussed in a meeting and hopefully I will soon find out if chemo is working on me..

I don’t know if I’m excited or nervous, all I know is.. I need some good news!

Other than all of the above I am doing great! Looking more like a true cancer patient by the day but still standing strong with my army of family, friends, loyal readers and most importantly God.

One of my best friends Jichi advised I speak more openly about the struggles I go through.. I know I tend to brush over them in most my posts as I like to keep my blog as positive as I can.. But I’ve taken on board her advice.. I hope to dedicate a post about my low moments.. I will try to be as transparent as I can.. But for now I want to focus on my scan result..

I hope the next time I write a post I will be sharing some good news.. 

I leave you with love and hopeful wishes.. And ofcourse some pictures of gifts from my nearest and dearest..

From my beautiful friend Avan.. words can not describe the support and love you give me.. Day in and out.. You are literally family to me

Jich.. A friend, a sister, and a life long companion through thick and thin.. You know me too well!!! Thank you for this beautiful gift which I am totally obsessed with!!! You’re a gem!!! 

My amazing friends Jichi, Huda, Iman and Neam.. What an awesome surprise!!! How spoilt am I??? I’m so grateful for such loving best friends.. I love love love my new camera and trust me I will be snapping away.. Good memories I pray for.. Love you guys so so much!!!

And finally.. I was blown away when I recieved this card through the post from my GP family.. My colleagues and friends.. I truly miss you all.. I miss work.. I miss all the trainees.. I miss my programme directors.. the staff.. everyone.. Your love and support means so much to me.. I can’t wait to get better and be amongst you all.. Thank you so much for this card which left me tearful with joy… Thank you from my heart.. 

With love xxx